I hide behind snooze buttons and busyness, excuses to avoid you, for fear of what you require of me: everything. Heart, soul, mind, strength, passion, purpose, understanding, ability— all of me, myself in sum, denied. I know my life depends upon surrender, so help my unbelief until I sit and listen and obey.
This poem was inspired, at least in part, by C. S. Lewis’s sermon “A Slip of the Tongue,” wherein he considers our hesitancy to draw too near to God for fear of what he may require of us, for we know that he requires complete surrender.
Confession: I wish you would do my will, For I would rather not surrender all. I would prefer more say in what you call Me to within your kingdom. Only kill Those parts of me with which I wish to part. Pick from the list I curate, then begin To excise only my unwanted sin, But leave the rest lest you disturb my heart.
O weak desire, false freedom, foolish dream. Such service would be fiction, for the throne Would be yours in name only. Lord, remove Me from my central focus and redeem All places where my heart is still like stone. In grace and mercy, pardon and reprove.
Little children, keep yourselves from idols,
Works of our own hands. Voices–our voices–
Call us to cast off all righteous bridles,
Chastise us for limiting our choices.
Choose you then this day your lord, your master.
Choose the voice you trust above all others.
Choose the path to life, avoid disaster.
Heed the voice of reason, sisters, brothers.
Learn distrust of self, for self is often
Led astray by varied vices. Passions
Harden hearts to truth. Consciences soften,
Filled with fleshly fears and fleeting fashions.
Build upon the only sure foundation.
Idols only lead you to starvation.
Compare at your own peril, for your life
Will never measure up to what you see
In others. You will only grow in strife.
You build a prison cell though you are free.
When we compare, we only see in part.
We view another’s gain where we have naught.
We note the diff’rences but miss the art
Of walking in the Way the master taught.
O faulty vision, warped by my desire,
Look not to other men but to the Lord.
Comparison would be to me a fire,
And its destruction I cannot afford.
So fight, my soul, temptations to compare
Or else resign to living in despair.
I am not infallible or inerrant. Neither am I sinless or untouched by the fall. As much as I wish I were, I’m just not. I’m a normal guy, saved by grace from bondage to sin, yet still struggling with sin. Continue reading →